Crushing the fairytale

Women, I want to talk to you about fairytales. Most of us grew up with watching fairytales. We were taught about princess’s and being saved by the bad villain by a chisled modelesque prince who always perservered.

Then we began to grow up, we realized that disney movies may not actually be reality and the men in our lives didn’t always look like those princes’. Yet, deep down in our heart we still longed to be saved. And those movies just fed that desire. However what our eyes were feasting on was the wrong answer. The desire is legitimate. But the answer has always been and will ALWAYS be JESUS. He is the one that ultimately saves us from hell.

  To often we have given into the fairytale dream, thinking that it is reality. That “mr. right” will walk up to us wearing the latest trendiest clothing, saying all the right things, thinking we are perfect, never complaining, having a 6 digit paycheck and a huge 5 carat ring in storage just waiting for us. This ladies & gentlemen is not reality. No matter who you are. We are all sinners, we are all human. Our breath does stink, we don’t always feel like dressing up, we may snap at the other person. But is this terms for writing someone off as the one? It better not be. Otherwise the said person will probably find themselves still single ten years later claiming “the one” still hasn’t come. That is because “the one” is a distant fairytale. We are so quick to come up with a fairytale in our heads of how everything will be sometimes we make a list, sometimes we put walls up and don’t let anyone in unless they meet our requirements. (Unless this is God inspired I don’t suggest lists and especially not walls) God knows who we need. Many times it doesn’t add up to what we imagined. Sometimes it is exactly what we imagined. Either way, our indicator of “the one” doesn’t not make them an option. God is the one that qualifies them.

Real love is beyond a fairytale. Real love is sacrificial, it does not boast, it suffers long, it is patient. Real love hurts. Because when the other one is hurting you hurt with them. Real love does not give up when times get hard. Real love preservers through the lonely moments, through the times of being rejected and it chooses to believe. Real love is only possible through Jesus Christ.

Love needs to have its perfect work in us. Forming us into laid down lovers. Choosing to die to self for sake of the other one to be all that God created them to be.

Love must purify our desires. We must allow Gods refining fire to have its way in our heart. Exposing our sin so that we may lay it at the cross and choose the better.

We must choose to surrender our dreams for His. Now that doesn’t mean our dreams are wrong, but they may not be Gods best for us. I don’t know about you but I want Gods best. I want the full expression of Gods love for me. And I also know that in my almost 26 years of living I have NO IDEA what that means. Somehow in our lives we think we know things, we know about life. But then I take a moment and reflect on how God is eternity, and me in my puny 26 years really doesn’t know all that much. The more I think about it, the more I realize my desperate need to cling to God. Because He truly does know whats best for me. He knows the beginning from the end. He wrote my story. He desires life for me.

So next time your “fairytale” interrupts the possibility of getting to know someone let LOVE interrupt that so called fairytale. You’ve already got a savior. A perfect one at that. Your future husband was never intended to be your savior. He would never, and could never live up to that. Let Holy Spirit speak to you about what makes a real man of God. Let God lead your desires. Not disney.

love.

Kymberly Janelle

Theres a new day

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There is a new day coming.

But first you have to take a step right here and now and let His love overtake you. Like a wave, allow it to take you out to sea. You don’t know where the current may go, but trust. He will get you there. Into the inner depths of his heart. Where his love will cast out all fear. There is a new day coming.

Let the waves of his love crash down and over upon you.

This is what its come to…

Trust.

If it were easy, would we still learn so much?

It seems to be the thing relationally that is all to easy to question.

Can I trust you?

God can I trust you?

{let it be known, my spirit knows I can. It is my flesh that is being submitted to the truth}

I can feel as this next season approaches, I am to continue to let go of more. To strip myself from any and all old concepts of how I thought life was to go. Life is so much bigger, grander than I imagined. There are more possibilities that I thought well, possible. When God restores he does a complete work. In restoration it means you have lost something. The thing is about losing something is over time you sometimes forget about it, you forget what it was like with that thing. Sometimes when we forget to dream, when we let go of dreams we forget the butterflies it imparted to our belly. We forget the pitter patter that comes deep within our hearts that seem to want to explode out of us when we do that thing.

Then like a silent rushing wind dreams are breathed on.

Love is re-awakened.

You turn your head looking for the source.

You see nothing.

But feel everything.

Everything in you is at peace.

Filled with hope.

Joy pours from your lips that form a smile which turns into a giggle.

A giggle that then explodes into a deep belly laugh.

This is hope.

This is joy.

This is restoration.

So when you find yourself being restored, redeemed what else is there to do but to live the life you once dreamed was possible. No matter how big or small it may seem to your neighbor. You stick with what God has spoken to you and you run and you don’t stop until the day you are called home. And so my journey continues…

And then I am reminded of Hebrews 12:1. I read it and laugh inside as the very words I typed in this blog are written here in the word.

HEBREWS 12:1
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.

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Blessings.

KJ

Late night thoughts.

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As I see my internship friends living there lives still in Kansas City I sometimes I wonder if going back to IHOP-KC would make life easier. If it would make my heart ache less, if it would somehow answer my questions. Now these questions don’t haunt me. They don’t cause me pain. They instead make me wonder at moments, they bring forth excitement. They cause me on nights like tonight to stay awake. I know the answer though. It wouldn’t. Life would still go on. I would still have questions. Possibly ever more there than here. So I do the only thing I can which is thank God for where he has each of his children, myself included. We are all on a separate journey. No journey looks the same in how we walk it out. I know in my heart where it is I am to be in this season. In the next season, well, that is a surprise for all:)

I can wonder, I can question. But ultimately it gains me nothing.

I can pray, I can read the word. That will gain everything.

Trust.

Hope.

It is the very essence of the christian walk.

Sole dependence on the man Jesus.

We are to walk not according to situations and circumstances, but rather according to the big picture. ETERNITY. My aim in life is to cultivate a lifestyle pleasing unto God.

It reminds me of last December in the prayer room at IHOP-KC crying out to the Lord not wanting to leave. Oh how my heart hurt in that season as I surrendered much more than anyone knew. And again I feel that season of surrender unto a season of miracles and HOPE.

This is tonights late night thoughts…

Girls are like

 

Tonight’s reminder to all those girls who need it.  Ladies, you are worth waiting for!

 

“State your intentions please”

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It is so strong on my heart to see men and women acting in accordance to how God intended singleness unto marriage to look like.

Tonight I have been reading some amazing articles after googling “christian dating”. I was pleasantly surprised at this amazing series in particular on singleness & dating as a Christian. I would highly suggest reading the following articles all the way through!

Stop Test-Driving your girlfriend

Real Men Risk Rejection

Brother you’re like a Six

Not your Buddy

A man should be required to state his intentions for a woman. If you are allowing him to be your best buddy & have your time/energy. He doesnt need to work for you, he already has your time, attention, energy. {Want to add, that the male on the receiving side may or may not acknowledge that he has this from you. Whether he does or not does not determine how you are to act.} I want to say this in bold because you are not to hand over to just any man let alone every man your heart, time, energy however this DOES NOT MEAN you are to make men jump through hoops women! What it does mean is that you have an understanding of your worth. You realize that you are a beautiful creation that is to be honored and respected. You are to be living for one man Jesus whether single or married. When your eyes are fixed upon Him, the man will need to make his intentions known because you should be so wrapped up in gazing at the one that you almost don’t recognize or notice him in a sense. I remember describing the process in which a man & women should begin a relationship from the womans perspective to a friend who was struggling with this very issue.

In your life you are to seek first the kingdom of God, gazing at the beauty of this man, exalting His name. Suddenly there is a man standing next to you, you notice him but go back to worshipping. Before you know it you and this man are running in sync towards the same prize and pretty soon you encouraging, pushing each other to reach higher than possible before. You realize that with this person you are able to do more for the kingdom, you are able to run harder, faster, you are able to endure more together rather than apart.

I would dare you to believe that God can and will fulfill every longing, every desire within your heart. That he will purify each and every one of those desires for his glory. Instead of leaning on the crutch of loneliness, and giving your time, energy, and heart away to a man who has not yet earned it give it all to Jesus. Trust Him that he will allow the right man to step in and ask when the time is right {yes, the man may not actually act upon the lords prompting for a good month or two or six, but remember he is human. This is where praying for your future spouse comes in;} It is so important as a woman to allow the man to pursue, for the man to initiate the relationship {whether that be asking you out on an official date, or having “the talk”}. God created men to lead, as a godly woman it is your duty to allow the man to be who God created him to be. Make him man up. You will not get in a relationship quicker if you choose to spend all your time with a man who has no intention of a serious relationship, you will instead most likely find yourself crying out to God confused & hurt. So bypass that and do it the God way. Seek God.

{I am sure I will blog on being pursued another day, because that is a whole ‘nother topic in itself.}

Blessings.

Kymberly Janelle

Must Reads for women!

I have read at least 6 of these articles now, and I plan to read every last one in this series. Im so excited about these articles from Mars Hill Blog. Im not going to make some big long post about them because frankly I still have 5 tabs open on my computer of articles to read in this series! Its a series/topics on Biblical Womanhood. And there incredible!! The link the series is HERE. My top 3 articles so far are these:

Dance floor Lessons

 

Role of Men & Women

 

Let me Submit to you

 

Single or married these are must reads for christian women!  Absolute Gold Nuggets in these articles.

 

{Did you learn to love?}

Well it’s officially the last week of the internship here at the International House of Prayer.

I really couldn’t come up with a better way for my second to last sunday to play out if I had the choice. I’m sitting in the best coffee shop with Jon Thurlow Christmas music playing in the background, outside snow has covered the ground, my peppermint hot cocoa and fudge nut cookie are awaiting my devouring. My ears picking up conversations around me, contagious laughter pours from a woman across the way, men in front of me are conversing about the goodness of God, others spread out sitting alone texting, emailing going about their day. {If you hadn’t noticed cafe’s are one of my favorite places to be.}

With it being the last week, the reminiscing has begun. The late night talks & crying in bed together with the roommates go early into the morning. The obsessive picture-taking, just to make sure we have everything documented in our time here. The packing, the exchanging of clothes. The deep cleaning… However admist all the laughter,  tears, breakthrough, and breakdowns my time here all come down to one question.

At the end of the night when I lay my head upon my pillow the same question that is asked of me nightly will be asked of me on that glorious day when Jesus returns:

“Did you learn to love”

plain and simple.

Did I learn to love?

When the photographs are lost, tears dry up, when being in prayer room is not longer required, when the friends move away. What is left?

The personal and financial breakthrough that one encounters are great, yet only goes so deep because of the following truth. It all comes down to love. Of what point is breakthrough,  friends, a great church, and good teachings without love?  If someone were to ask me what I have learned in being here it was the very thing I was contending for. To know love. In coming here I discovered what real love is, who it is. Love is not an emotion, it is an action. It is not a distant feeling, it is not something afar off that only some can touch. All can reach for love and touch it. Yet one must first reach to feel it. Love is all around, it is all encompassing, it cannot be contained. Love is always loving. But we must choose to love, to feel love, to recieve love before to begin to what depths love itself has gone for us to feel love for eternity. This love, the force behind love is Jesus. Jesus is Love. All He does is motivated in and through love. There is nothing He does apart from it. It is in his jealous zeal that He cuts out all that would hinder love. It is in His bridegroom heart that He woo’s his Bride.  Its all for love.

 

L.O.V.E.

{Bridal Paradigm}

The following entry was written for internship class. Topic: Describe the Bridal Paradigm

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body.  Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her,  that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word,  that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.

{Ephesians 5:22-27}

The intention of marriage from the heart of God is to take two humans as two paintbrushes to paint a picture of what Love is. It is to symbolize the relationship between God and His people. Just as marriage requires a purity covenant/remaining faithful to their spouse, so God expects the same from His church which He refers to as His bride. In me saying YES to God He requires my allegiance to Him, to remain faithful to Him without any other lovers {Lovers in this context would refer to anything that hinders love} Many times the Body of Christ {His Bride} forget that Gods love is in the context of the bridal paradigm. The story of Jesus is not about some God who came down, gave up His life and now demands we listen to Him and do whatever He asks. In fact that couldn’t be farther from the truth. God came in flesh as love, with the desire to re-unite His people back to Himself. With a jealousy that even death could not quench.

The bridal paradigm is an invitation, a beckoning into the eternal love of God. To experience His desire and love for us just as a groom on earth so loves his bride so God loves His people. His love is an everlasting love that cannot and does not waver. It cannot waver even in the midst of trial and tribulation; when us humans would question love, loyalty, or desire it is Gods love that stands strong.

In the earthly view of a bride and groom, the engagement is the promise of whats to come. At this time a man places a ring on the woman’s finger as a promise that they will soon be together forever until death separates them. Then the wedding comes. In the wedding vows they state that the bride and groom will stand by each other for better or for worse, through sickness and health; and from that day forth they belong to each other and no other. Just how on earth as marriage is to be a sacred relationship between one man and one woman God uses this illustration to show His people what He has in store for us. In our own love story with Jesus, He came declaring His love to His bride, that He would lay His life down and then take it back up again so that His bride may live FOREVER with Him. This promise far surpasses what any earthly marriage can offer here on earth. Our hope lies in another age.

God created marriage here on earth as an example of His love for His people. Many people {myself included} have believed that marriage is the pinnacle of love. But the more I read scripture I see that marriage here on earth is merely a reminder of whats to come for ETERNITY between the King of Kings and His Bride. What Jesus promises to me and every believer is a dedication that no earthly man or woman can promise or accomplish.  Marriage on earth is not the crescendo of love. It is merely a glimpse into what eternity will be like. With that said let us not forget that God created man and woman for marriage, PRAISE GOD! And I am so excited for my day to come when marriage will become a reality for me.

Jesus is zealous for my love, for my unhindered attention and devotion just as He is devoted to me. He laid down His life for me {He did this knowing that I may not say yes, that some days I would doubt His love, and some days straight up deny His love}. Just as an earthly fiance would promise by a ring Jesus did this by His blood. I am sealed in His love, by His promise. That He will come for me. Every time I feel weak, or as though circumstances are crushing in around me I am reminded it is because my groom is not here. Life is not complete without the King of Kings reigning on earth.  Jesus’s promise to return to earth for His bride speaks of His dedication and loyalty to His people. This love no man can hinder, and Jesus himself will not relent until I surrender all. Marriage here on earth is a lot of times epitomised as the ultimate showing off that you are loved, but it is not the earthly marriage that gives one identity. It is the marriage to the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords that grants me true identity. The bridal paradigm provides me a place of abiding in His love, resting in His promise that all will be made right. He is not one that would go back on His word, He will come back for me. He will make me brand new. This is what I live for to be loved by Him, and to love Him. The very one who thousands of years ago poured out His blood so that I would know who I am. I am loved by the very one who is love. There is no greater marriage/covenant I could desire to be in.

L.O.V.E.

{Uncreated Love}

my love is weak

my faith is small

my courage never seems to last long enough

uncreated love is who you are

would you blow on the flames of love in this heart you created

show me that this can last

your love is uncreated

it always was

and always will be

for eternity you are love

you have traded me my weakness for your strength

you have given me your power to conquer all

uncreated love

take me away in your love

 

L.O.V.E.